Tenali Rama

Shiv Sena reiterates concern for farmers, says it is discussing `malaai’ first

By Tenali Rama (Follow @IamTenaliRama)

The Shiv Sena and the BJP have criticised the onion farmers of Maharashtra for creating hurdles in the formation of the government in the state. Ten farmers have reportedly committed suicide in Marathwada region in the last five days after unseasonal rain damaged their onion crop. This has sent the onion prices skyrocketing in most parts of the country. 

“Is this any time to commit suicide? Could they not see we are busy with more important matters? All those who kill themselves till the two parties decide who will be CM, are anti-national,” said a Shiv Sena leader privy to the deliberations over government formation.

Reiterating its commitment to the farmers of Maharashtra, the Shiv Sena says the focus of the leadership is right now on the dairy sector. 

“Right now, we are discussing how to get a bigger share of the malaai. In the interest of the farmers, Shiv Sena is demanding a lion’s share of the cream so that we can progress faster,” said the Shiv Sena leader.

The BJP too is unhappy with the bad press it is receiving over the farm distress.

“You see Devendra Fadnavis at this point in time is a caretaker chief minister. What does the term mean? It means people of Maharashtra have to take care of Fadnavis ji. Instead these irresponsible onion farmers, at the instigation of the opposition, are bringing tears to everyone’s eyes,” a BJP leader told Tenali Rama.

Highly reliable sources have revealed to Tenali Rama that contrary to popular belief, the discussion is no longer confined to government formation in Mumbai. With talk of the country looking at a second capital given the problem of pollution in Delhi, Nagpur is being spoken of as a choice given that it is geographically centrally located. The Shiv Sena has demanded that if Nagpur is declared as the second capital, then the second PM of the country should be a Shiv Sainik. 

(This is a work of satire)

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